fun, Fun, FUN!!!!

Ok, I've been waiting for days to be able to say this!!!!

My best friend, Nichole, is expecting her first baby!!!! YAY!!! They recently lost a precious little one, so this joyous news is that much more AWESOME!!!

What is the coolest thing of all is that (In case you missed the hint: see below!) we will be going through our pregnancies at the same time, nearly to the date. She is about two and half weeks ahead of me, but since my doctors will induce me a few weeks early, our little ones could be born within days of each other or on the same day. I think I'm almost more excited for her than I was for my own little plus sign!!! :)

Oh, and get this, in addition to Nichole and I, there are five other ladies that I know personally who are expecting a bundle of joy next summer, and two others that are due sooner than that. How cool is that??? I'm the third one to be pregnant in our church, and with less than ten families, that's saying something!

It's definitely a baby boom around here, so don't drink the water in Texas unless you're wanting to get pregnant!! LOL

Did you see??

Anyone notice my sidebar???

hehe

Some encouragement for Moms

Are you like me, a mom to small children, maybe with several underfoot and expecting another???

Well, when you have a few minutes of quiet time, check out this new blog. Susan Brown is the author. She is a pastor's wife and the mother of four children and grandmother to many more. She is so encouraging in her posts. You'll find Christ-centered, God-honoring, practical advice!

Thank you, Susan, for being another older woman to encourage the younger who are coming along in their walk as women, wives and mothers who want to love God and honor Him with their lives!!

Successful Moms at Home

O let my trembling soul be still,
And wait Thy wise, Thy holy will!

I cannot Lord, Thy purpose see,
Yet all is well since ruled by Thee.

Unknown Author

Remember

I didn't know this, but today is the National Day of Remembrance for infant and pregnancy loss. As most of you know, Steven and I have lost three children over the last seven years. We've also been blessed with two wonderful little boys.

Over the last month, I've had some conversations with friends and with my mom and my aunt about pregnancy and loss. One of the things that came up in those conversations and one of the things that the Lord taught me through the death of our daughter, Abigail, is that no matter how short a life is, every moment should be celebrated! Every moment should be treasured!

After our first loss, we struggled over the decision to tell our family and friends when I got pregnant that second time. It was so hard to have to make those calls! I remember especially that the morning before I miscarried the first time, I had called my aunt to tell her our good news. Within a few hours of that phone call, I began to suffer the symptoms of losing the baby. I remember how shocked she was because she had only just learned our news.

So, is it easy to think of calling family and friends and telling them you've lost your most precious gift? Absolutely not!!! But, for Steven and I, we feel that we should give all those who love us a chance to join with us in the joy of a new life, whether that life be weeks or years long. As my mom has told me more than once, the only time she ever had with my daughter Abigail was in those months that I carried and nurtured her within me. It's the only time any of us had with her, and how priceless that times is to each of us! Every memory of those nine months are sacred to us because they tell her story, and they remind us of how many lives she touched in her life and in her death, and how many people around the world love and pray for our little family.

Today, as I think of that day when I will meet my three little ones in glory, and as I watch my two wonderful boys play in our home, I will be thankful for the little moments. The little boy hugs and kisses. The giggles and sounds of my husband wrestling with the boys while I cook supper or read on the couch. Those baby coos and babbles that Brandon blesses us with. The stories and imaginations that Ryan loves to spin. The little moments that become a lifetime when you understand and remember that eternity truly is around the next corner.

Treasure your loved ones today.

Hug your babies, big or small.

Share each moment of your pregnancy with those who love you--if it's long, they will rejoice with you; if it's cut short by loss, they will cry with you and carry you through the pain.

Most of all, look to our blessed Saviour, the Creator of all life, and thank Him for becoming Man that He might redeem to Himself a people. Without Jesus Christ, all the joys and pains of life would be meaningless and empty. He alone is our Hope and Joy and Reason for living each moment to the fullest--For His glory and honor, each and every day.

On Hold

Wow! It's been a long time since I've been able to write anything here. By now, I'm sure most of you have given up on me--at least those of you who don't already know my reasons for being away from blogging.

Several times, I have mentioned here my struggles with organization, time management, priorities, etc. Well, the Lord has been dealing STRONGLY with me in all these areas. I have come to the place that I know I MUST get myself, my family and my home priorities in order before anything else. Because of this, I have been using the computer for email and preparations for shopping. That's it. I haven't been reading blogs, and I obviously haven't been blogging myself.

I'm continuing to work on my home. There is SO much out of order and so much that's need my attention. I'm working more consistently now to get things cleared and cleaned and straighten and FINALLY in order!!! Slow, but steady--that's my goal!

My husband and my children are so precious to me...have I mentioned that??? :)
There is so much that I need to be focusing on for my family. I need to MAKE more time for my husband, more time to meet his needs. I need to spend more time just being with my boys, playing, teaching, going for walks....

And most importantly, I need to have more time with God. Understandably, it's difficult to find or make quiet time with young children, but I am striving towards this more and more. I need it SO MUCH!!!!

With all these realizations before me, I have decided that blogging isn't my priority right now. I miss it. I do, but I have to be faithful to what I know the Lord and my husband want from me.

All that being said, I am putting my blog on the back burner for now. I will try to put in updates every now and then, but don't expect too much. I wish I were more organized and could post lots and lots, but I'm not. I have to accept that, work on it, and know that my blog will be here when I actually have time for it. For now, I'm off to be with my children and work on something in my house.

:)

With An Eye On The Times--

My husband shared this with me today. I think it's important to spread the word.
Look at the issues- Realize the outcome of these promises of change- Don't just listen to eloquent speeches!

2008 PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE COMPARISON TALKING POINTS

ISSUE		JOHN McCAIN	BARACK OBAMA
Favors new drilling offshore US		Yes	No
Will appoint judges who interpret the law not make it		Yes	No
Served in the US Armed Forces		Yes	No
Amount of time served in the US Senate		22 YEARS	173 DAYS
Will institute a socialized national health care plan		No	Yes
Supports abortion throughout the pregnancy		No	Yes
Would pull troops out of Iraq immediately		No	Yes
Supports gun ownership rights		Yes	No
Supports homosexual marriage		No	Yes
Proposed programs will mean a huge tax increase		No	Yes
Voted against making English the official language		No	Yes
Voted to give Social Security benefits to illegals		No	Yes
CAPITAL GAINS TAX
MCCAIN	0% on home sales up to $500,000 per home (couples). McCain does not propose any change in existing home sales income tax.
OBAMA	28% on profit from ALL home sales. (How does this affect you? If you sell your home and make a profit, you will pay 28% of your gain on taxes. If you are heading toward retirement and would like to down-size your home or move into a retirement community, 28% of the money you make from your home will go to taxes. This proposal will adversely affect the elderly who are counting on the income from their homes as part of their retirement income.)
DIVIDEND TAX
MCCAIN	15% (no change)
OBAMA	39.6% - (How will this affect you? If you have any money invested in stock market, IRA, mutual funds, college funds, life insurance, retirement accounts, or anything that pays or reinvests dividends, you will now be paying nearly 40% of the money earned on taxes if Obama becomes president. The experts predict that 'Higher tax rates on dividends and capital gains would crash the stock market, yet do absolutely nothing to cut the deficit.')
INCOME TAX
MCCAIN (no changes)	Single making 30K - tax $4,500 Single making 50K - tax $12,500 Single making 75K - tax $18,750 Married making 60K- tax $9,000 Married making 75K - tax $18,750 Married making 125K - tax $31,250
OBAMA (reversion to pre-Bush tax cuts)	Single making 30K - tax $8,400 Single making 50K - tax $14,000 Single making 75K - tax $23,250 Married making 60K - tax $16,800 Married making 75K - tax $21,000 Married making 125K - tax $38,750 Under Obama, your taxes could almost double!
INHERITANCE TAX
MCCAIN	- 0% (No change, Bush repealed this tax)
OBAMA	Restore the inheritance tax Many families have lost businesses, farms, ranches, and homes that have been in their families for generations because they could not afford the inheritance tax. Those willing their assets to loved ones will only lose them to these taxes.
NEW TAXES PROPOSED BY OBAMA
New government taxes proposed on homes that are more than 2400 square feet. New gasoline taxes (as if gas weren't high enough already) New taxes on natural resources consumption (heating gas, water, electricity) New taxes on retirement accounts, and last but not least....New taxes to pay for socialized medicine so we can receive the same level of medical care as other third-world countries!!!

You can verify the above at the following web sites:

http://money.cnn.com/news/specials/election/2008/index.html

http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2008/issues/issues.taxes.html

http://elections.foxnews.com/?s=proposed+taxes

http://bulletin.aarp.org/yourworld/politics/articles/mccain_obama_offer_different_visions_on_taxes.html

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/fact-checker/candidates/barack_obama/

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/fact-checker/candidates/john_mccain/

Imagination

There are so many changes that happen in a little person's life at the age of four. Ryan is learning and growing before our eyes, it seems. Every day, he's surprising us with new ideas, amazing thoughts for one so young, and crazy imaginations.

Right now, he's fighting a whole host of "bad guys" with his "friends". Yes, imaginary friends are our constant companions these days.

It's so fun to listen to him spin these stories of his mind's eye! I wonder sometimes what his future holds with such a great imagination. Who knows? Maybe he'll become a renowned story teller! :)

His newest concoction is arrows that he and "his men" are shooting at the bad guys. When they hit them, it turns them good. If only we actually had some of those.

I'm daily amazed by my boy and how awesome it is to be his mother!

From the directors of "Facing the Giants"

Hey all!

It's been a while since I've been able to get on the computer, but I wanted to take a minute to share this with you. It's a new movie that's coming out in September.

Argh...

I've been offline for the last several days. My computer is very sick...I'm still nursing it along. The only way I'm able to connect right now is because I borrowed an extra CPU from my dad. I hope to have my own up and running soon, but alas, it takes SO much time to work through these things. I definitely don't have an abundance of extra time!

So, don't forsake me my few friends! I'm still here, just laying low.

:)

Psalm 46 - Be still and know that I AM God

God separated the salt water from the fresh, made dry land, planted a garden, made animals and fish... all before making a human. He made and provided what we'd need before we were born. These are best and more powerful when eaten raw. We're such slow learners...

God left us a great clue as to what foods help what part of our body! God's Pharmacy! Amazing!

A sliced Carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye.. and YES, science now shows carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.

A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart has four chambers and is red. All of the research shows tomatoes are loaded with lycopine and are indeed pure heart and blood food.

Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.

A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds on the nut are just like the neo-cortex. We now know walnuts help develop more than three (3) dozen neuron-transmitters for brain function.

Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes, they look exactly like the human kidneys.

Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and many more look just like bones. These foods specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet, the body pulls it from the bones, thus making them weak. These foods replenish the skeletal needs of the body.

Avocados, Eggplant and Pears target the health and function of the womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats one avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight, and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? It takes exactly nine (9) months to grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).

Figs are full of seeds and hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the mobility of male sperm and increase the numbers of Sperm as well to overcome male sterility.

Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetics.

Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries

Oranges, Grapefruits, and other Citrus fruits look just like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breasts and the movement of lymph in and out of the breasts.

Onions look like the body's cells. Today's research shows onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes. A working companion, Garlic, also helps eliminate waste materials and dangerous free radicals from the body.

(Anonymous)

Tears

I borrowed this from my friend's blog.

It's precious promise is the only hope we have as parents who have given our children directly into the arms of our Saviour. Those little ones whose stay was only fleeting, yet forever lasting in our memories.



I'm just a precious little one
Who didn't make it there:
I went straight to be with Jesus,
But I'm waiting for you here.

Many dwelling here where I live
Waited years to enter in;
Struggled through a world of sorrow-
A world marred with pain and sin.

Thank you for the life you gave me,
It was brief, but don't complain:
I have all of Heaven's Glory'
Suffered none of Earth's great pain.

Thank you for the name you gave me.
I'd have loved to bring it fame:
But if I'd lingered in Earth's shadows-
Would have suffered just the same.

Don't you fret about me Mommy,
I'm of all God's Lambs most blest;
I would love to be there with you,
But the Shepherd knows what's best.

So Sweet family - don't you sorrow,
Wipe those tears and chase the gloom;
I went straight to Jesus' bosom -
From my Loving Mother's womb...

(Author Unknown)

We love you, Nichole and Steven. You're in our prayers.

Super Savings!!!

Well, I may have been feeling a bit burned out on coupon shopping, frugality in general and watching every penny, but yesterday renewed my excitement about shopping specials.

I was able to score $32 worth of baby products for ONE CENT out of pocket!!! I did use two cards to do that, but it's worth it cause I will definitely be using all of it, either for Brandon or to put together gift baskets for friends.

Here's a quick break down of what I did at CVS.

Using the $2/1 CVS coupon that's out right now, I bought 8 items off the baby sale list that cost $2 each. I checked out each item separately in order to get them FREE! After I "bought" the last item, the $5 ECB printed out! Fun!!!
NO MONEY OUT OF POCKET-- EARNED $5 ECB!

Here's what I got in that(those) transaction(s):

2 Baby shampoo
2 Baby wash, lavender
4 Baby wipes (I hadn't tried the CVS brand wipes before, but I really like them!!! I won't be passing them up now!)

Ok, then, after such great success using those $2/1 Q's, I decided to go ahead and try the deal again with my other card. I only had 5 coupons left, so I bought 4 items, again baby bath products that were $2 each, separately, then I did the fifth transaction. That one looked something like this:

1 CVS Children's Tylenol--$4 (I decided on this because it's the one medication I don't have stocked in my pantry, and Ryan will be needing it in the next couple weeks when he get shots! My poor baby!!)
2 Baby wipes--$2 ea.
Total- $8
Used $2/1 Q
Used $3.99 ECB and $2 ECB
Paid $o.o1 OOP!!!
EARNED $5 ECB

It was exhilarating to walk out of the store with all that free stuff!!

I'm looking forward to next week's Johnson and Johnson's sale! I hope to be able to get even more baby products! YAY!!!

I also was able to go to Kroger and shop their 10 item sale. Fro those who don't know how it works, you buy ten item that are on the list and automatically receive $5 off when you check out! Obviously, the best deals are when you combine this with great coupons, coupons that double or triple!! I did spend more than I normally would have because I wanted to stock up on the Sargento cheese that was $1.50 for 8 oz. That's not a super great price, but for a 32 oz. bag of shredded cheese at Walmart, I pay about $8. This is something that our family uses regularly, so a $2 savings over my usual pay out was a deal I didn't want to pass up. I was able to use coupons to get--
Free BC cookie mixes
$0.25 Cattleman's Bar-b-que sauce
$0.50 Lysol All-purpose cleaner(40 oz concentrate--Great deal!!)
$0.50 Pledge furniture polish

Those were some of the better deals I got yesterday. If Kroger weren't 30 miles away, I would strongly consider printing more coupons today and hitting the store one more time, but that wouldn't be frugal considering the price of gas!!! :)

Anyway, it's been so long since I shared any of my shopping adventures with you that I thought I take a few minutes while my floors are drying to tell you about this week's escapade!

Oh, I forgot!! JCPenney's is having a great sale right now!!! If you need baby clothes, they have a lot of their summer rompers, shirt and short sets, etc marked down to $1.97 each! I was able to get several outfits for Brandon since he's just now outgrowing all of his comfy, summer rompers!!

Ok, time to put my kitchen back together, feed us some lunch and tackle the rest of my dirty, messy house! Cleaning, cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning! There's my agenda for today!!

Happy Saturday, everyone!!

:)

It would be cool to do this!!! :)

~From GirlTalk's Friday Funnies

CVS resource

For all of you who are shopping or want to start shopping at CVS, here is another good website with easy to access ads, deals and printable coupons. Check it out if you want. I will also be adding it to my sidebar for future access.

I Heart CVS

Little moments, wonderful memories

Aw, the results of a walk to Grandma and Grandpa's house in the July heat of Texas-- soft snores coming from both my boys. It's amazingly relaxing to hear them sleeping! :) I'd share a picture, but it takes so long to get them uploaded right now...you'll just have to imagine.

Ryan is tucked into his bunk bed, Teddy by his side, blissfully unaware.

Brandon lay down by my side on the floor, completely spread eagle, and promptly fell asleep. He's the cutest thing ever when he's resting this peacefully.

I love being Mommy!

*sigh*

Earning money online

Hey all,

I took a few minutes today to add some links to my left-hand sidebar. These are links to sites that I am using to earn a little money when I have some free time.

I'm especially trying to use Ebates! For a while now, I've been doing more online shopping when I need something for my house or for the family or when we're planning a trip out of town where we'll need a hotel or rental car. Going through Ebates allows me to earn a percentage back on my balances. The percentage varies from store to store, but anything earned is great!! :)

Anyway, I hope you'll take some time to check out these sites! Just click on the links on the sidebar. I've had fun learning the ropes, and though I'm still new to it all, it's something small I can do to have a little extra coming in.

Priorities

Well, if you're anything like me, you're probably ecstatic to see that I've finally posted something new. I'm not sure what it is about having two children versus only one, but I definitely have LESS time. Imagine that.

I have been accomplishing things around my house(faint applause heard in the background!) and have been super busy. We got back last night late from a long weekend in San Antonio. My younger brother was in for a visit. It was December, I think, the last time I saw him. He's a brilliant, brave member of the US Navy! We're very proud of him. Anyway, we take whatever time we can when he's in Texas to travel to see him. We know that at any time he could go overseas to fight in this war. Every moment is precious.

I really am having so little time to really sit down and write a decent post. I am seriously disappointed with my recent efforts and am striving to only post if I actually have something worthwhile or at least halfway interesting to share. That's why I've posted pictures. No need for fluffy words.

Like I shared before, I have a great many topics floating around my mind, but to put them on paper, Ah, what an accomplishment THAT would be! Right now, my home and my family are needing my attention more than this keyboard. I'm having to learn that priorities are necessary and GOOD for me. I just wish there was more of me to go around because I do enjoy writing something more in depth than the latest update on how my life is going or how I'm feeling on any given day. Not that that isn't interesting to someone out there, but I have so much MORE that wants to be written, so much more DEPTH that desires to come out.

But if I'm learning anything these days, it is that God wants more from me than surface religion. The Almighty created me for more than passing pleasures. I have been given the gift of life eternal and two sons to teach about Christ and the gloriousness of the gospel. I have failed in this area, and I MUST keep going to Jesus for the grace, wisdom and discretion to train my sons in the way. I have a husband who needs me by his side, to truly be his help meet.

So, if my posts here are fewer and fewer, know that I am instead using my time learning more and more to be the wife and mother God has chosen me to become.

Until the next time...

:)

Accomplishing SOMETHING!!!!!

Thank you for all your sweet comments, thoughts and prayers regarding my painful shoulders! I'm a little better, but still dealing with pain. I've decided that I will just ignore it for now though because I have too much to do to keep whining about it! (There's a true "sister of compassion"! You know who you are!!!)

Anywhoo, my hubby and I are busy getting ready for yet another garage sale. We still had lots left to deal with after the last one, so we packed it up, stuck in the shed, and now are ready to give this another go.

I'm also in the middle of tearing my house apart, taking down beds, rearranging furniture, cleaning, cleaning, and more cleaning!!!

Yes, I'm definitely ignoring my shoulder. I figure if it's going to hurt when I rest, maybe the stretching, pulling, pushing of all the above will work out some of the kinks for me. Either way, it's going to hurt, and I'm determined to make my house a HOME!!! In every sense of the word.

I've had candles, floral arrangements, pictures, shelves, etc packed up or stuck on book shelves in a back room for months now. I'm sick of the clutter and SOOOO ready to get things out and PRETTY!!

Don't you agree? A pretty home is a welcoming home. Clean, uncluttered, care for, yet lived in...that's my goal!!! I may not reach it in my whole house this weekend because of the garage sale, but I'm going to at least get my living room spruced up.

We started by taking down the full size bed in our guest room. At this point, it was only a holding place for boxes and other stuff that's needed attention. I (well, more precisely, my husband and two other friends) moved (Picture three guys turning it on its end to get it around the tight corner!) my piano to the same spare room, opening up my living room for a more comfortable setting of the furniture. It's amazing how OPEN it feels now! I pulled, pushed and grunted my couches aroudn the living room this morning, until I found a new arrangement that would work better and still "feel" right. I think I may have finally settled on the configuration I can live with for a while. Now, I can work on getting pictures up on walls, candles out on tables and shelves. Yes, I can finally DECORATE!! YAY!!! I'd do a happy dance, but it would jar my shoulder too much! :)

Well, I've used my few minutes of break time to type this up. I'm off to tackle something else!!!

:)

Borrowed Thot

One of the best things a parent
can do for a child is make
that child feel that home is the
happiest place in the world.

A Mother Is Love

Rest is needful

I've been in PAIN today. For whatever reason, my shoulders keep getting so tightened up that it hurts to even be awake. It hurts to move. It hurts to be still. It hurts to sit. It hurts to lie down. It hurts to stand. You get my point. IT HURTS!! Throw in a little one that has wanted nothing but to be held and close to me today, and you get me--a very tired, slighty grumpy me.

I am also very much missing Ryan. He's been gone for over a week now, staying with Grandma for a visit. It's been so long since she has been up to having him, but I'm more than ready for him to come home. As it is right now though, it will be another week and a couple days before I get to hug him again. I'm sad. I may not make it that long. I may just have to call to tell them to bring my baby home!!!

It's nearly eleven now. Brandon has finally cried himself to sleep. Poor baby has chosen to take the hard road these last few nights and cry it out, instead of peacefully being cuddled to sleep. Boys are that way. Are girls? Maybe one day I'll have an answer to that.

I think that my body is tired enough now to possibly fall asleep even with the pain. I still can't hold my head up straight without sharp jabs down to my fingertips, but I need to rest.

Until the next moments of quiet, I'll leave you with this quote from my A Mother Is Love calendar.

For God is sheer beauty, all generous in love, loyal always and ever.
Psalm 100:5
THE MESSAGE

:)

Father and Son

Oldies, but goodies!

Lessons Learned :)

Here's an example of what happens when I forget to zip my purse. Ryan decided to put make up on Brandon. Fun times!!!!
:)

Borrowed Thots

The woman who creates and sustains a home...
is a creator second only to God.

Helen Hunt Jackson

Bear with me, people. I've been very uncreative when it comes to my blog of late. I have thoughts rolling around in my head, but when it comes to getting them in order and in the white box, there seems to be a lack of communication between my brain and my fingers.

So, stay tuned. Maybe I'll get the creative juices flowing again soon. Right now, I'm off to do a little housework before my love walks through the door.

:)

Forever Love

On June 17, 2000, I married my high school sweetheart, the love of my life. Now, eight years later, we are still so much in love and have so very much to be thankful for. It amazes me to think of everything we've been through together, everything we've experienced as a couple, everything that brought us together. God has been so good to us!!

To my husband~

Thank you so much for loving me, caring for our boys and me, providing for us, and just being here. You've always been my safe place when things are falling apart around us. Thank you for your strength. I am so grateful that the Lord put us together, that he joined our lives in such an awesome way. I pray that we will have MANY more years together, raising our children, loving and growing old together. Thank you for a wonderful day yesterday. I couldn't have wished for more! :)

I love you, today and always.

The Audrey Smith Story

Below are three vidoes that chronicle the journey that Todd and Angie Smith have gone through these last months. I'd encourage you to spend a few minutes listening to them tell the story of their daughter Audrey. I think it will bless you as it blessed me yesterday.

Joy and Sorrow

I spent some time this morning reading about Audrey Caroline Smith. I've shed many tears and been reminded that my Lord doeth all things well.

My heart and my arms ache for my own daughter, but I rejoice in the knowledge that she is with Audrey in heaven. They are safe and happy in the arms of Jesus. How can I wish them back to this world of hurt, sorrow and pain?

Oh, Jesus, help me to see You always in every storm and truly trust that You know and control every outcome. Thank you for allowing me to carry and love my Abigail while she was here with us.

June 10

Today is a special, special day for our family!!

Four years and nine months ago(or somewhere around that!) those two pink lines appeared! I can still remember how I felt. I was pretty sure of the outcome of that test, but to actually see it confirmed after such a difficult loss was almost overwhelming. But it was true!!! A few weeks later, my doctor told me that all was going well. We would welcome a new little baby the next June. I remember that first of many sonograms that revealed that we would be having a baby boy. With Steven and my parents there with me, it was a special moment we will all treasure.

I can't say that those nine months flew by, but eventually, we did come to this day four years ago. The day that we finally got to meet our little boy. The day we actually got to hold our baby and know for sure that everything was going to be ok. We had a son!

We welcomed into our life and our family Ryan David Walker. Weighing in at 6lbs, 6oz, he was just a little guy, but oh, how we loved him!! How we STILL love him!

Today he turns four years old. He getting so very big that it almost makes me sad. My tiny baby boy who needed me for everything imaginable is now a tall, skinny boy who has a definite independent streak.

I'm thankful that he still needs those hugs and snuggles every day though. Ryan is my cuddle boy. He has a hard time going to sleep if Mommy doesn't snuggle, hug, kiss and pray with him. I treasure these times because I know that soon enough he's going to be "too big" for those icky kisses. :)

So, happy birthday, my Ryan! We love you and are so thankful for this new year of life to watch you grow and change and learn new things.