Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Remember



I didn't know this, but today is the National Day of Remembrance for infant and pregnancy loss. As most of you know, Steven and I have lost three children over the last seven years. We've also been blessed with two wonderful little boys.

Over the last month, I've had some conversations with friends and with my mom and my aunt about pregnancy and loss. One of the things that came up in those conversations and one of the things that the Lord taught me through the death of our daughter, Abigail, is that no matter how short a life is, every moment should be celebrated! Every moment should be treasured!

After our first loss, we struggled over the decision to tell our family and friends when I got pregnant that second time. It was so hard to have to make those calls! I remember especially that the morning before I miscarried the first time, I had called my aunt to tell her our good news. Within a few hours of that phone call, I began to suffer the symptoms of losing the baby. I remember how shocked she was because she had only just learned our news.

So, is it easy to think of calling family and friends and telling them you've lost your most precious gift? Absolutely not!!! But, for Steven and I, we feel that we should give all those who love us a chance to join with us in the joy of a new life, whether that life be weeks or years long. As my mom has told me more than once, the only time she ever had with my daughter Abigail was in those months that I carried and nurtured her within me. It's the only time any of us had with her, and how priceless that times is to each of us! Every memory of those nine months are sacred to us because they tell her story, and they remind us of how many lives she touched in her life and in her death, and how many people around the world love and pray for our little family.

Today, as I think of that day when I will meet my three little ones in glory, and as I watch my two wonderful boys play in our home, I will be thankful for the little moments. The little boy hugs and kisses. The giggles and sounds of my husband wrestling with the boys while I cook supper or read on the couch. Those baby coos and babbles that Brandon blesses us with. The stories and imaginations that Ryan loves to spin. The little moments that become a lifetime when you understand and remember that eternity truly is around the next corner.

Treasure your loved ones today.

Hug your babies, big or small.

Share each moment of your pregnancy with those who love you--if it's long, they will rejoice with you; if it's cut short by loss, they will cry with you and carry you through the pain.

Most of all, look to our blessed Saviour, the Creator of all life, and thank Him for becoming Man that He might redeem to Himself a people. Without Jesus Christ, all the joys and pains of life would be meaningless and empty. He alone is our Hope and Joy and Reason for living each moment to the fullest--For His glory and honor, each and every day.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

On Hold

Wow! It's been a long time since I've been able to write anything here. By now, I'm sure most of you have given up on me--at least those of you who don't already know my reasons for being away from blogging.

Several times, I have mentioned here my struggles with organization, time management, priorities, etc. Well, the Lord has been dealing STRONGLY with me in all these areas. I have come to the place that I know I MUST get myself, my family and my home priorities in order before anything else. Because of this, I have been using the computer for email and preparations for shopping. That's it. I haven't been reading blogs, and I obviously haven't been blogging myself.

I'm continuing to work on my home. There is SO much out of order and so much that's need my attention. I'm working more consistently now to get things cleared and cleaned and straighten and FINALLY in order!!! Slow, but steady--that's my goal!

My husband and my children are so precious to me...have I mentioned that??? :)
There is so much that I need to be focusing on for my family. I need to MAKE more time for my husband, more time to meet his needs. I need to spend more time just being with my boys, playing, teaching, going for walks....

And most importantly, I need to have more time with God. Understandably, it's difficult to find or make quiet time with young children, but I am striving towards this more and more. I need it SO MUCH!!!!

With all these realizations before me, I have decided that blogging isn't my priority right now. I miss it. I do, but I have to be faithful to what I know the Lord and my husband want from me.

All that being said, I am putting my blog on the back burner for now. I will try to put in updates every now and then, but don't expect too much. I wish I were more organized and could post lots and lots, but I'm not. I have to accept that, work on it, and know that my blog will be here when I actually have time for it. For now, I'm off to be with my children and work on something in my house.

:)